The three of us raised an important issue today at lunch, and it is this: if you had a pit full of marshmallow Peeps, and it was infinitely deep, how would scientists determine its infinitude?
Of course, the pit isn’t actually infinitely deep. It’s on this planet, so its depth is geologically limited. But this is a pit where, essentially, it’s Peeps all the way down. Checking stats about the Earth’s crust reveals that, while it could be up to 50 km thick, it’ll quickly get hot enough to melt Peeps. So let’s say that you have a kilometer of solid-ish Peeps, then a couple kilometers of melted/roasted/plasmogrified Peep.
But it’s not a wide pit, maybe 3 meters across. So scientists that wander by will at first guess that it isn’t, in fact, Peeps all the way down, but rather more like a ball pit, but with Peeps. After that delicious and playful hypothesis is dashed, how will the scientists go about determining its depth? We figured a drill wouldn’t be able to maintain the structural integrity of a shaft were it to drill down. And a scuba exploration would be futile, although hilarious. Would some sort of acoustic measurement work? We have no idea.
What about a laser? Get a sweet laser, and start burning a tiny column through the Peeps. Perhaps you’d have to do it in pulses, so that the heat of the laser didn’t cause nearby Peeps to expand and be incinerated, collapsing the shaft. George thought that the vaporized Peep gas would build up and cause problems, so you’d have to vacuum it out. That’s getting too complicated. Plus, with the Earth’s crust getting too hot and all, you wouldn’t be able to get too far before hitting the melted Peep layer. I guess it would be pretty good to get through the solid, compressed Peep layer and realize that there’s more than a kilometer of Peeps, using just the laser that every good scientist carries.
It seems, though, that there’s got to be a more efficient way. We put the question to you, world. Efficient Peep pit depth measurement techniques? Please, let our cries be answered.